If you really want to make the bond between yourself and the Universe stronger, connecting and communicating would be much more effective then any spell.
Honey, the fact that you said "sometimes I beg for sadness as sadness is my only comfort," concerns me a great deal! Sadness is something we go through and something we should live by. Please talk to your parents about seeing a psychiatrist or at least a counselor.
Undo whatever spell you did. Sarah doesn't need to be connected to whatever sadness you have going on. Magick should be used to help enhance your life and help improve what you have in your life.
Any love spell you created can be easily undone using the same process you used to create it. In the future, I recommend you don't perform any love spell to strengthen a relationship unless (a) you two are committed to each other and (b) they know about it.